close your eyes and relax

i want to talk about something other than what’s in the pictures.
i just washed my hair and i don’t know where my good hairbrush is, the one that is good when my hair is wet. this happens all the time. i never know where anything is.

i just took a shower and i want to blowdry my hair because i never do and it would hopefully look prettier if i put some effort into it. but my back hurts and i don’t want to get dressed or stand up.
but i have to.
the easiest thing to do would be to put on my green summer dress.

but that is not what i did.

so, think what you want, but this is me, now.
old, deformed.
it’s true and it’s how i feel, so this is my blog and i can say so if i want. this is also why i am going to the gym. i am being brave and courageous.

i weigh 150 lbs right now.
my back kills me and my core needs major work.
i need a lot of cardio and i need lots of muscle tone to help support my skeleton, crippled as it may be.

anyway, i am very glad i joined the gym and it is going to change my life for the better. i already did an aerobics class called R.I.P.P.E.D. it was HA-larious.

i am so out of shape and uncoordinated. not a negative statement, simply truth.

plus i am a hermit so it is a big deal for me to go out and mingle with the commoners. so to speak. just kidding. you know what i mean.

lots of things to do at the gym and people to see/watch.

yesterday i tried every single machine i was interested in because the place was basically dead, so i didn’t feel very awkward.
there are all kinds of people there, not just hotties with bodies.

it looks like i have a huge gut here. and i do.
but, it is very nice to use this ab machine thing.
it is much easier on the back than floor situps.

not the best picture, but i am more like doing the best i can to try and document this new experience in my life and it is awkward and weird but whatever.

i’m out of practice.

i guess that’s all the pictures i have to torture your eyes with for now!!!

territorial pissings

i was trying to capture a wonderful moment.
this fails to translate. haha.
the sun was gorgeous. the grass was divine.
and then there’s me.
haha
the purple grimace.

again. failure to capture moment.
this thing was good. except it needed a little bit more of that runny stuff it’s supposed to have in it, right?

i think i finally got a normal night’s rest last night. phewf. that’s good.

okay, guys. time for another day of making the most of life! let’s do it!

a yabba dabba doo time

sitting here watching my friend work on his deck.
after these photos, decided to put make-up on.

oliver, i think. he looks very similar to his brother.

so serious and glum.
i know. always have been, really.

they are extremely similar in appearance. i’ll show you in a minute.

another un-sexy outfit.
i must do it on purpose, huh?

those weren’t my shoes.

here are my shoes.

so industrial, no?

my friend is an architect, you see. he built everything you are seeing in these photos. and this is just the garage.

by the way, Home Alone 2 is pretty much the worst movie of all time.

why do we do this?
come on, you know tons of people do it!
not just females, either.

i’m talking about taking repeated photos of oneself in the same general position, etc…

it’s a way to see what you look like. i’ve mentioned this before. my fingers are so cold right now that i don’t feel like typing. but maybe typing will help get the circulation going in my hands.

aw. she’s so cute. even cuter with my decorations added.

lovely. oh, do you remember My Melody?
i used to like her the best when i was a kid, i think.

veal piccata. was yummmmmmy

very cool architectural feature of my friend’s work is all the ‘unfinished’ ‘exposed’ sort of inside out stuff going on.

a lovely late lunch/appetizer.

the principal architect designed and built this structure.

intense and serious.

abundance

ok so this one is called the Johnny Cash sandwich. sliced sourdough.
very tasty. that was my lunch yesterday.

i went to the Folsom Market Street Fair yesterday after eating half my sandwich. uh-oh. tons of stuff to taste. fun! those cheeses were delish. nice neckerchief.

omg their krauts were amazing. i thought my photo would help me remember the name. i don’t. but they will be in our store’s pickle bar and believe you me, i will be buying their stuff. the curry one and the dill one? so good. i love me some kraut.

he was just setting up. i wasn’t able to stay to hear his performance.

BEEKEEPING IS FUN!

these things are incredible. raw macaroons. so yum!! made with cold-pressed extra virgin coconut oil so they actually BURN fat!

they took a break right before i was trying to take a photo of them carving it.

the cracker has Ancho Chili jelly with cream cheese. mmmmmm.
and the cup is an apple pie.

jujubees. they taste like a really dry apple that also tastes like a pear.

i made a really cool video of myself in the photo booth. you can watch it here.
i’m such a dork. seriously. it’s embarrassing.

work has been interesting lately.
so has my life.

my horrorscopes have been so great lately, too.

today:

“You feel increasing pressure to make a decision, and romance or finances are feeling the intensity of this focus. What to do! Follow your instincts on this one, not what appears on the surface as you know the true path. Fear of the unknown is no excuse to ignore the inevitable. Loss only opens brand new doors.”

so apt. every day, too.

my travels of late

so… let’s go back, shall we?
i went on an airplane. well, four different airplanes in two days, to be exact. the definition of a whirlwind trip.

i took lots of pics of the airplane wing. it’s been many years since i’ve flown. over ten years.

i think this was somewhere above sacramento.

i fly swa. they can turn a plane in 20 minutes. whatever that means.

exciting snacks. tomato juice.

woo hoo! livin’ the high life, right?

this is LA

swimmin’ pools. movie stars.

i know, i am no movie star.
and i am gross for taking my coffee into the airport bathroom.
i was accosted with germs from every direction on the entire trip, tho. so whatevs.

i took my immunity supplements.

not sick yet, fingers crossed.

LAX.
haha
nice hat, right?

airport bagel breakfast. $4.75 (thanks, mom)
good thing we got it since they don’t serve food on the 3 hr flight to missouri from LA.

i think this was descending on Kansas City, MO

sorry this is the longest post known to man.

those are my son’s feet. we were at a fruit stand in missouri.

i wish he would have filmed our experience there because it was quite hilarious and memorable.

home-jarred pickled eggs. so cool! reminds me of Dances With Wolves. i was always fascinated by the jar of pickled eggs that one guy had on his stagecoach thingy.

this is the house where my son lives.

i am wearing a silly cow hat because that is what i am. a silly cow! XD

here i am with my new grandson and my ex-husband.

i think this was above seattle.
i had a lovely salted caramel mocha there but by the time i went to take a pic of it all the pretty stuff was melted. boohoo. tasted great, tho.

yeah. seattle. mhm.
i love the atmosphere there so much. too bad i couldn’t spend more time. i did hang out there once, tho. a long time ago. when i was like 24 or something. so beautiful and fun.

ok. that’s long enough, y’all. hope you found it somewhat interesting. it’s been a busy week!

the flip side

i am transferring to a new store in two weeks.
moving.
yay, me!

i ripped this out of a magazine because he is my boyfriend and i wanted to carry his picture with me so i could drool over it. haha. but then it started getting folded up and creased so i decided to leave it here for someone else to enjoy! ha.

had two of these yesterday and they were so delicious but i ended up having a headache for the rest of the day! sucks. i even took a nap and drank water and emergen-C and took an advil. still with the headache.

this evening may be preliminary pumpkin carving will begin. by that, i mean it is way too early to carve pumpkins but so what!

today SHOULD be a good day. the first day of the rest of my life. AND i am not CLOSING, which is always good.

the future of the body

see? i am participating in popular culture like a good little human.

i will celebrate by eating sea creatures.
salmon.
delish.

on the computer at work.

i look like my paternal grandmother in this photo. at least i think so.

making the best of the sun shining in my eyes.

i am so fat right now.
i am serious.
FAT.
must be hormonal.
i have no idea.
i am just not getting enough exercise.
so now i will humiliate myself on the internet in order to motivate myself to fix the situation.

i’m pretty sure the lovely lady on the left was wearing a leopard print thong over her leggings.

a long succession

went to the doctor with a friend the other day.
yesterday?
seems longer than that.

i was spy-like and stealthy.

my nails are an ever-evolving work of art in motion/action.
so…
it’s a torn tendon.
surgery advised.

i think this one got into the l.s.d. or somethin
he’s lookin’ crazy-eyed.

dude, i made fun of my friend because she is so picky about what she eats…. (dietary restrictions)
but then right after i made fun of her, she was eating an apricot and it was moldy, which she only noticed after swallowing the first bite.
so then i felt like a jerk.

i had offered her one of these carrots and she was like “what’s on it?” and i was like, i dunno, cilantro bits?
and she rinsed it off.
but she has food sensitivities, which really isn’t fun. i know.

land shark.
(that was random, because it’s shark week. i tried to change my template to be shark themed but the universe was not cooperating. so we revert back to cotton candy.)

ought not to have done this.
but i did.
i probably paid some sort of price, body-wise.

i guess i am watching dancing with the stars.

i paid the price for sharing in the consumption of this meal.
heartburn for dayz.
UNenjoyable.

matches!

okay. prepare yourselves.
the following videos are embarrassing and just… idk
ridiculous.

embarrassing

i need to toss that skirt. it does nothing for me.
comfy, tho.

expect more of this insanity.
hey. i am deformed and crippled and handicapped and special ed. so just remember that.

wish me luck

i have two more days off and there’s been a change of plans.
the thing i took the days off for is not going to happen.
so then i was bored and thought of something else to do.
i am going on a soul-searching road trip today.
i know my destination and i intend to return tomorrow.

it’s kind of a leap of faith.
i feel like i’ve been taking a lot of those lately.
putting it out there.
going for something even if i feel a little trepidation.
you only live once

instead of sitting around stewing over everything,
i made a move.
set it in motion.
now, i just gotta follow through.

so i’m gonna make the best out of it.
enjoy myself
and we’ll see how it goes.

just can’t hide it

look what i found!!

so exciting.
so, i am guessing this is similar to how banksy works?
it’s paper glued to the wall.

to me, it’s sexy.
it’s like stealthy rebel art.
it’s like “HA! ART! IN YOUR FACE! unauthorized! illegal!”

okay, i admit, it was me. (bad grammar intentional)

cuz i am a huge rebel, like that.

just kidding. i’m not quite this cool, yet.
soon, i will be, i am hoping.

that is all.
this was like a moment of heaven that started my day out.
then i went to work and had a massage, that was actually very emotional because my back holds so much pain and tension.
a ten minute introductory massage, more like massage foreplay because now i want a two hour massage! every day!

that is what i should ask for for my birthday from my mom. again. she got me one a while back, it may have been last year. boy time really is going faster. you know it.