myriad

do you pop out at parties?
are you un-poop-ular?

i REALLY LIKE my new boyfriend (seen here).
he did not REALLY LIKE this dress, however.
even tho it was supes awesome.

we had strawberry shortcake for dessert last night. .
the berries were fresh-farm-picked by a zen strawberry stand lady.
we made the whipped cream by hand.

i am going on a DIET! no salami, no bacon, no cheese, no bread.
(i always say that)

i need to edit my FACE out of this picture! haha. jk
but this is an authentic hawaiian dress and i LOVE IT.
but this is not the dress i will be wearing to my son’s high school graduation next saturday.

it’s a different authentic hawaiian dress and you will see it later.

no make-up. that’s the main problem.

your mom goes to the gym.

hm. my body is odd(y)

ahhh.

today the pool was dead. it wasn’t very hot today. which is nice.

i’ve officially been a gym-member for one month, today.
i’ve only been out to the pool around three times.
i’m timid.
that’s why.

gym swimsuit.
it’s a speedo.
it does not really hide my deformed back.

oh well. c’est moi.

pun-tacular

a feast fit for royalty.

it’s okay, because i’m working out. just kidding, that doesn’t make it really okay. but it’s soooo goooood.

i’ve been trying all the different machines (i always have to concentrate when i type the word ‘machine’ because my hands or my mind or both want to type ‘maching’ or ‘machings’).

i’m learning a lot.

it’s great. going to the gym is the best thing for me at this time.
it is a good thing.

i have a round face and a not-so-strong chin plus this taken using flash from a low angle does not work well for my look.
but i still think it’s worth blogging.

i’m looking better, tho. i mainly need to continue to burn off fat and work my muscles to make them stronger. it’s a great and worthy way to spend one’s time and truly beneficial. almost really we should feel an obligation to (with pleasure) work our bodies and focus on them and mold them into the best that they can be.

right?

it increases quality of life, mood, posture, mobility, etc. and when zombies attack, YOU’LL be READY! RAWR!!!!!

close your eyes and relax

i want to talk about something other than what’s in the pictures.
i just washed my hair and i don’t know where my good hairbrush is, the one that is good when my hair is wet. this happens all the time. i never know where anything is.

i just took a shower and i want to blowdry my hair because i never do and it would hopefully look prettier if i put some effort into it. but my back hurts and i don’t want to get dressed or stand up.
but i have to.
the easiest thing to do would be to put on my green summer dress.

but that is not what i did.

so, think what you want, but this is me, now.
old, deformed.
it’s true and it’s how i feel, so this is my blog and i can say so if i want. this is also why i am going to the gym. i am being brave and courageous.

i weigh 150 lbs right now.
my back kills me and my core needs major work.
i need a lot of cardio and i need lots of muscle tone to help support my skeleton, crippled as it may be.

anyway, i am very glad i joined the gym and it is going to change my life for the better. i already did an aerobics class called R.I.P.P.E.D. it was HA-larious.

i am so out of shape and uncoordinated. not a negative statement, simply truth.

plus i am a hermit so it is a big deal for me to go out and mingle with the commoners. so to speak. just kidding. you know what i mean.

lots of things to do at the gym and people to see/watch.

yesterday i tried every single machine i was interested in because the place was basically dead, so i didn’t feel very awkward.
there are all kinds of people there, not just hotties with bodies.

it looks like i have a huge gut here. and i do.
but, it is very nice to use this ab machine thing.
it is much easier on the back than floor situps.

not the best picture, but i am more like doing the best i can to try and document this new experience in my life and it is awkward and weird but whatever.

i’m out of practice.

i guess that’s all the pictures i have to torture your eyes with for now!!!

mustard ‘n mashed potatoes

omg. everyone is in a conspiracy to make me gain 1200 lbs.

no’m sayin’?

nobody likes that as much as i do.
oh well. i can’t get enough of it for the time being.
no’m sayin’?
haha
sorry

heirloom ‘maters.

so, this lovely smoothie was for breakfast, to balance out the delightfully sinful dinner.

homemade smoothie all fruit: strawberry, mango, pineapple, banana, orange… plus coconut milk and almond milk mostly because it was too thick and needed to be smoothed out.

yellow.
the freesia will smell wonderful soon.

couldn’t resist.

my sister found this in a thrift store.
wow.

i really should stop going to frozen yogurt.
it’s time to reign in my eating situation!

taking my health into my hands

this starts today.
i took the first dose and am drinking hot lemon water.
then i will drink my fiber drink.
then have a hot green tea.
then eat a mango.

after this one-week cleanse, i will do a liver cleanse. i already have it. i have all this stuff i got as vendor gifts and demos when i was working in vitamins and supplements. may as well make some use of it, eh? ya think? why not.

at last night’s meeting we had to deep clean the kitchen. fifty employees running around with soapy towels and buckets. it was chaos. but when we were done: SPArKLe MoTioN!

it sucked. i am normally asleep at that time! i went to see Mission Impossible with a friend, just to pass time before the meeting and i could not stay awake. just like when i went to see Salt. i have discovered for certain that action/adventure movies put me to sleep.
i just have no need for them, generally speaking. i’m not a dude. haha. no, i don’t know what it is.

it’s not even 8AM, i have not even attempted to look pretty… hair, makeup.
these pictures serve as inspiration to do something about that AND

even tho i’ve seriously lost ten pounds this week due to a change in routine which included not eating as much (especially not gorging at night), not drinking quite as much and walking 30 mins twice a day…..

i still have a LONG way to go.

i was feeling super skinny and these are my favorite clothes… but the photos were a reality check. :-(
not there yet.

i will be joining a gym next month, tho. or as soon as possible.

liquor-lanche

this dress is nice.
ann taylor loft.
so nicely tailored.

was told i look like a candy cane.

spent my weekend napping and over-indulging.
fun!

we got lots of special attention at the grocery store because someone is gimpy.

seven bucks
it’s for burning man.
well, in honour of…
a souvenir
and
who knows, maybe i can utilize it somehow for work when we are supposed to be dressing up this weekend? or not.

that’s my shirt.
the people at the store thought he was a burner.
lol

their words are crystal clear

they’ll kick you and they’ll beat you and they’ll tell you it’s fair!
so beat it!
but you wanna be bad!

JUST BEAT IT!
BEAT IT!
no one wants to be defeated!

the future of the body

see? i am participating in popular culture like a good little human.

i will celebrate by eating sea creatures.
salmon.
delish.

on the computer at work.

i look like my paternal grandmother in this photo. at least i think so.

making the best of the sun shining in my eyes.

i am so fat right now.
i am serious.
FAT.
must be hormonal.
i have no idea.
i am just not getting enough exercise.
so now i will humiliate myself on the internet in order to motivate myself to fix the situation.

i’m pretty sure the lovely lady on the left was wearing a leopard print thong over her leggings.

the hills are alive

i feel very frustrated with my fatness.
it’s unpleasant to be overweight.
it feels disgusting.
my clothes feel gross.
it is not fun.

but i love to eat mass quantities.
and i don’t seem to love exercise. i am lazy?

i am not looking for opinions here.
i know how i feel.
FAT. and OLD.
that’s how.
and i know i am not the only female who struggles with this issue because pretty much all of us do, in some way or another.